It'd be nice if it gave him an ulcer, that then got perforated.
But it's more likely he's just lying yet again.
this post was submitted on 01 Jan 2026
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I hope he's in constant pain
I hope he dies in the stupidest, most humiliating way possible. And soon.
I don’t. I hope he strokes out and becomes trapped in his own body. I want MAGA to see a frail, weak, pathetic flesh bag.
I don’t love this comment.. it implies people who have had a stroke are frail, weak and pathetic. Although I share your disdain for Trump, I’m not sure I agree with this particular sentiment.
I wasn’t implying anything. This is the outcome from HIS stroke I want to see.
Accidentally shits his pants in a mcdonalds and the sudden change in pressure in his body causes his organs to collapse all at once and as he falls to the floor, with his dying breath, he exclaims:
"doctors tell me i have the best death, actually, some say , in the world. They dont make deaths like they used to, but im bringing them back, good deaths, they will be back, they will come back, the good deaths, i think, like rambo. It'll be like the movies, with the action hero... err... the guys with the guns, they dont get hit, the hullets just miss em, like me. Bullets cant get me, they tried to do it, i was on stage, it was a BIG event and the democrats, biden, they tried to shoot me. They failed, they missed, because they needed republican guns. If that was a republican they wouldnt have missed, my brains would be all over the crowd behind me. They would have needed staws to clean it all up, so i am bringing back plastic straws, not those paper ones, they fall apart in your mouth....."
Reports of the rest of what he said differ vastly.
I hope it's of natural causes on live TV
Cool story bro.
Make sure to use that horse dewormer.
Because manly men can’t listen to doctors; they have to exceed the dosage!
Take more. Don't let those quacks tell you what to do. More.
JUST DIE ALREADY GOD DAMNIT.
Embroider this on a pillow.
I can't embroider, but I can make a cute lil cross stitch of it
That’s a good idea; I’m thinking Trump should probably take 4x-5x daily just to be on the safe side.
It would probably be safer with some warfarin on board, too.
And he should shave with a straight razor before he’s had anything to eat.
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Since Tylenol apparently causes autism, can we now decide that Aspirin causes dementia? Just curious.
It can cause internal bleeding, so if he's being stupid with the dose, then things like bleeding out in his sleep might be feasible.
2026 might be a good year after all!!
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He must think there’s somebody stupid enough out there to believe what he had to say.
Then again, tens of millions of people did vote for him…
Shaking hands doesn’t cause that type of bruising on the back of the hand, and neither does aspirin. You know it does? IV needles, which are, not infrequently, inserted into veins on top of the hand.
He must think there’s somebody stupid enough out there to believe what he had to say.
There are 77 million of them.
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The interview appeared to be one of the most extensive conservations Trump has had with journalists on his health
Heh.
I don’t give a fuck about his health.
I do. I care very much. I hope he continues to not listen to his doctors and bigly departs from their advice.
Don’t hold back Donald. What’s worse is I heard not taking aspirin causes autism. Better load up.
I very much doubt he's in charge of what pills he takes much less knows what pills he takes. Frankly at this point I'm shocked he's not taking colloidal silver.
I could very easily see him taking aspirin on his own.
He wakes up and decides to put on that hideous orange concealer every day. No one is telling him to do that, he found that on his own and thought it was great and decided to wear it everyday. Why is it so hard to believe that he pops an aspirin everyday off some decades old advice about baby aspirin that he misunderstood?
I have a feeling he only showers once a week or so, which saves time in his skincare routine. Would also explain why he's rumored to smell like literal shit.
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