this post was submitted on 29 Jan 2026
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Poor Lonnie. May he cry himself to sleep on his MyPillow tonight.

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[–] pimpampoom@lemmy.zip 17 points 10 hours ago (2 children)

And yet their stock is skyrocketing, something is not right

[–] Formfiller@lemmy.world 3 points 4 hours ago

House of cards

[–] druidjaidan@lemmy.world 1 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

I mean it isn't? It spiked up in September and is flat since and is down like 15% since the beginning of the year. Could it/should it be lower? Perhaps, but it's not skyrocketing.

[–] suicidaleggroll@lemmy.world 13 points 10 hours ago

If you ignore the election bump in Nov 2024 that had completely reset by Mar 2025, their stock is up 100% in a little over a year. Yes that counts as skyrocketing, considering sales and profit have plummeted over the same time frame.

[–] TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 10 hours ago

Not enough.

[–] yopyop@sh.itjust.works 8 points 12 hours ago

/c/mademesmile

[–] dxgsthrr@feddit.uk 23 points 16 hours ago (2 children)

$TSLA fanbois always claim that only Tesla can sell EVs at a profit / with a huge margin (something like $10k per vehicle). Would be interested to see what kind of margin per vehicle they are making now that the tax credits are removed and it appears that much of the profit came from energy storage.

[–] hovercat@lemmy.blahaj.zone 31 points 16 hours ago (2 children)

Those crazy margins lasted for like 2 quarters until it was revealed that one of the main ways they managed it was severely under allocating warranty. It was a neat trick, until vehicles actually started to come back with warranty claims and they realized they literally make the least reliable and most expensive to repair cars on the market. IIRC they were allocating like 1/3 of what Toyota does per-vehicle, which is absolutely insane given the kind of vehicles they make. Hence why they became insanely stingy with warranty claims, and you saw tons of in-warranty repairs being allocated to "goodwill" which is a distinctly different pool from warranty allocation.

The entire company is built on fraud and shell-games with SpaceX/Starlink/Boring Co. and Musk has straight up admitted as much. No one gives a shit and a judge literally ruled he's allowed to do it because line go up.

I can rant for hours about all the insanely sketchy stuff they've done solely for a one quarter boost, and plenty of other stuff where their cost-cutting directly resulted in loss of life.

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 9 points 13 hours ago

plenty of other stuff where their cost-cutting directly resulted in loss of life.

https://www.tesladeaths.com/

https://www.forbes.com/sites/stevebanker/2025/02/11/tesla-again-has-the-highest-accident-rate-of-any-auto-brand/

Now we know why DOGE got rid of the NTHSA.

[–] midas22@lemmy.wtf 5 points 13 hours ago

I can rant for hours about all the insanely sketchy stuff they’ve done solely for a one quarter boost, and plenty of other stuff where their cost-cutting directly resulted in loss of life.

My favorite is how Tesla invested in Bitcoin in 2021 and started reported unrealized gains from its Bitcoin holdings in certain quarters when the price went up but then just omitted it for the next quarter when it was down. I believe that they have changed the laws regarding that now... if that matters.

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 8 points 13 hours ago

The big change is Chinese EVs coming into Canada. Tesla sales tanked after Heil Hitler but it's only a matter of time before they enter the US. Tesla only made money for years selling carbon credits.

[–] gravitas_deficiency@sh.itjust.works 38 points 19 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago)

Tesla’s board:

hey, I know, let’s give the ketamine enthusiast who sieg heil’d a dementia-ridden psychopathic racist twice on national television a trillion dollars this year as a comp package.

[–] scroll_responsibly@lemmy.sdf.org 39 points 19 hours ago
[–] hardcoreufo@lemmy.world 18 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

Somehow stocks will go up.

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 12 points 16 hours ago

It's slid 8% over the last month. But at a 282 p/e, it could lose 90% and still be overvalued.

[–] ArmchairAce1944@discuss.online 34 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

The fact that it isnt completely under is unacceptable.

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 16 points 19 hours ago (3 children)

Stock price went from $430 to $450.

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 9 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

It's been sliding all month.

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 4 points 13 hours ago (1 children)
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[–] bitjunkie@lemmy.world 8 points 17 hours ago

The car manufacturer is a front for the ~~money laundry~~ investment vehicle

[–] hector@lemmy.today 60 points 23 hours ago (13 children)

And let me guess, stonk went up still?

It's not about the companies, it's a gamble stock, divorced from the performance of the company.

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[–] melsaskca@lemmy.ca 11 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

As well it should have. You can't sell many vehicles to people who still remember what nazi's were. Yet who really cares. In the aftermath of the nazi shit and dropped sales his board cronies paid him a trillion dollar bonus! CEO bonuses work both ways I guess, in this corrupt, fuck you, world.

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 7 points 17 hours ago

He did not get $1T. The milestones he has to reach to see that number have already failed.

Tesla Motors is a fail, now Tesla robots are going to make a profit even though they have never revealed a working prototype?

[–] panda_abyss@lemmy.ca 58 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (6 children)

I honestly don't know how Musks companies work.

Tesla makes cars. Cars don't sell, so profit drops. Musk uses SpaceX to buy Teslas. Tesla's profit declines, Musk says it's an AI company, then buys AI from his other AI company, which he funded from Tesla stock. Musk buys Twitter, twitter goes down in value. Musk buys Twitter from himself using xAI, for higher than its market value, then boasts stock gains?

So now Tesla is going to buy AI from himself, and build robots that were just pantomimed guys in suits... and somehow... profit???

I don't know what the fuck is going on in this world. But I would absolutely love to see Tesla's stock drop and all of this made up debt-financing fall apart like the house of cards it is. However, Musk saying "we're making robots now" seems to have nicely papered over what should be a massive stock decline. After his last one "Tesla isn't a car company, it's an AI company" now it's "Tesla isn't an AI company, it's a factory company".

[–] pastermil@sh.itjust.works 25 points 23 hours ago* (last edited 22 hours ago) (5 children)

It's simple in its principal, really..

  • you have multiple companies
  • one company (A) have some supply for some product
  • on the other company (B), you create demand for that product (i.e. for its operation)
  • thus, under your control, you make company A and B enter a trade agreement
  • as someone who brokered that deal, you get rewarded (e.g. from brokerage fee, or commision)
  • sometimes, by having a massive increase in sales, the stock for company A would increase, thus you can sell a little bit of it, which you can later buy back after the stock price goes back down
  • profit

Some facts:

  • even though they're your companies, you are a separate entity from them, and they are each its own entity
  • the money comes from the investors as well as profit, remember that they are separate
  • no, you cannot just take all the companies' money, since even though they're yours, there are corporate structures and other people at stake preventing that

So you basically come up with some excuse for moving stuff around, then you come up with some excuse to siphon off some of that good stuff.

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[–] Sam_Bass@lemmy.world 7 points 18 hours ago

Even if it got banked 100% it wouldn't stop his Nazi rhetoric

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