0.3 away
Away what? Apples? Eggs?
this post was submitted on 08 Feb 2026
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.3 of a delivery, duh.
As in, they were .7 of the way done when they crashed.
Most well universally known measurement system is likely light years, so probably that
The SI base unit for length is the meter, so they crashed 30cm (12 inches) away from you.
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Seeing as everything else in the notification seems to be about money, I'm guessing 0.3 dollars.
Surprised they didn't suggest getting another delivery driver for half price to bring it the rest of the way.
You can send flowers to the hospital room tho
I accidentally 0.3 away. Is this dangerous?
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Is this a late stage capitalism?
👨 🫴🦋
No lats stage would have you, the person whom ordered the food, responsible for the gig workers hospital stay - as you are their employer.
Click here to begin crowdfunding your dasher's ER visit.
it would probably be more along the lines of you having to pay potentially lost profits directly to the company, while the driver has to pay his own bills... and the driver has to pay for potentially lost profits too
Always has been
No seriously, the term "late stage capitalism" is so old, it has existed longer than capitalism exited before its coinage. So if this really is the last stage, this last stage is already longer than the stages before were.
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This is fake?
The real nightmare is you can't even tell anymore.
my exact feelings, I am more horrified at the fact that I am still not sure if this is fake or not (without actual fact checking ofcourse)
It had me until the flower button. Doordash would never
They'd never what, attempt to profit off of an emotional reaction by presenting an option that most wouldn't even have thought of on their own but kinda makes you feel guilty to decline?
It may be the one dude that does nothing but come up with dystopian UIs
Dystopian? Or just the beta version?
This particular image may be, but this is a real thing that happens of the dasher is in a wreck while completing your order.
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It was. But now, if the idea makes it to the right executive...
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Double oopsie! Your driver delivering flowers to your other driver was in an accident! Would you like to deliver flowers to the driver who was delivering flowers?
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"Your dasher crashed, but based on his tracking, he's still crawling towards you. This could induce some delay. If you go meet him on the way, you can get a rebate on your tipping fees!"
"Would you like to call an UberAmbulance?"
Ahem, an Ubulance.
Oopsie woopsie. It wooks wike your uwu dwiwu was in a wiwwy bad caw cwash. Would you wike to caw an ambuwance?
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It's a trap. Like in the famous documentary, 'The Santa Clause', if you examine the crash site the drivers body will disappear and YOU will become the Door Dasher, and be required to fulfill all of their commitments.
Sir you can't be on this side of the police tape. Are you are related to the deceased?
No, but I'm just going to snag my Mickey Donalds right quick and I'll be out of your way.
"sEnD fLoWeRs tO yOuR dAsHeR's hOsPiTaL rOoM" 💀
"your Dasher has died in a collision but here's a pin drop in the chance you can collect your order from the wreckage"
At least there's still a chance for profit, just got to sell some flowers
Your flower delivery driver crashed 0.3 away from your food delivery driver. He can still crawl through the fog of pain to the flowers but they might be fucked up beyond all recognition.
Send chocolates to your flower delivery driver's hopsital room!
0.3 what away from me? Miles? Kilometers? Meters? Units matter - I'm not driving to the other side of town just to pick up a bloody pizza.
bloody pizza
It said it might be damaged. We don't know how bad the accident was and how much blood was involved
If you can't be bothered to step out of your comfort zone and travel .3 AU to pick up your food, I don't know what to tell you. Maybe you want the crippled driver to spoon feed it to you.
(/s, obviously)
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the dasher delivering your flowers to the previous dasher's hospital room, has gotten into an accident
"Oh my god is he ok?"
"Yes your food is 50% ok!"
I hate capitalism.
I actually had this happen once. Dasher got in an accident
The app just showed his car going in circles around the point he crashed
Probably hit a fairground carousel
I wonder what % of people seeing this think it's real? People really gotta keep an eye on the community and understand what shitposting means
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Needs instructions for in person pickup.
"Your dasher wears a medical bracelet identifying his next of kin. To expedite access to the crime scene to retrieve your order (1x bagel bites, 4x lubricant and 1x grain alcohol) dash++ members can unlock this name to then pose as a direct relation when authorities ask."
This looks like a Soren mockup.
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