this post was submitted on 10 Apr 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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top 21 comments
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[–] FederatedFreedom1981@lemmy.ca 25 points 3 weeks ago

"From the Personal Office of RFK Jr."

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 22 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Either that or all diagnosed autists got together and summoned Pluto into existence. We'll never know

[–] Barbuzie@lemmy.world 4 points 3 weeks ago

I like your idea, now I believe it's what actually happened

[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 20 points 3 weeks ago
[–] mycodesucks@lemmy.world 11 points 3 weeks ago

Actually, since there was no autism before that, autism is Pluto's intentional punishment to humanity for daring to discover it. It's an attack. Commence war on Pluto.

[–] dwemthy@lemmy.world 10 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

knowledge of Pluto causes autism

[–] saplyng@lemmy.world 4 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

This implies that Pluto is a lovecraftian entity, and that brings me much joy

[–] stephan262@lemmy.world 2 points 3 weeks ago

Well actually. In the Lovecraft story The Whisperer in Darkness, the Eldrich beings are from the newly discovered ninth planet. So yes, it is canon to Lovecraft's work that Pluto harbours Lovecraftian horrors.

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 8 points 3 weeks ago

A bunch of obsessives scouring the sky for additional planets probably had nothing to do with it.

[–] theuniqueone@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 3 weeks ago

Unfortunately the attempt to cure autism by demoting pluto from planet to dwarf planet has failed.

[–] Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works 6 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Don't joke about this. If Trump or one of his goblins sees it, they'll do something about it.

[–] webp@mander.xyz 2 points 3 weeks ago

The plutussy is too far to grab

[–] FreshParsnip@lemmy.ca 2 points 3 weeks ago

Send all the nukes to Pluto

[–] sentient_loom@sh.itjust.works 3 points 3 weeks ago

Maybe the real truth is that autism discovered Pluto

[–] CircaV@lemmy.ca 2 points 3 weeks ago

Pretty much.

[–] NeilNuggetstrong@lemmy.world 2 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Ackshually Pluto is not a planet so it can't cause autism

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 3 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Also: more than 99.9654% of autists live on earth. Is that also a coincidence?

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 9 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

All known deaths in the universe have happened on Earth. Coincidence? I think not.

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 4 points 3 weeks ago

Wait, that's the planet I'm on

chuckle I'm in danger

[–] webp@mander.xyz 3 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Well, there is the dog that died in space.