this post was submitted on 09 Jul 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


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Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

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5 year old me was not ready for this responsibility while I was sitting there watching Saturday morning cartoons.

top 22 comments
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[–] gigastasio@sh.itjust.works 33 points 5 days ago (3 children)

Well you haven’t been doing a very good job now have you? Can’t even count how many forest fires I’ve seen and said to myself, goddamn CrawlerNumber1994 failed us again.

[–] wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz 4 points 4 days ago

Goddammit, OP!

[–] CrawlerNumber1994@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 5 days ago (1 children)

You're right, all those California fires over the last 3 decades are all on me. Sorry guys. I'll try harder going forward.

[–] Crackhappy@lemmy.world 3 points 4 days ago

You forget all the ones that happen all over the world and in the past century alone. You're really falling asleep on the job.

[–] cheese_greater@lemmy.world 6 points 5 days ago

Its like how every little thing or ritual Philadelphia Eagle fans do butterfly-effects the Phillies abillity to win the Superbowl final

[–] Triumph@fedia.io 17 points 5 days ago (2 children)

Many years ago, I got a fortune cookie that said:

The future is in your hands.

So... Sorry everyone.

[–] Buddahriffic@lemmy.world 4 points 4 days ago

Wait, I think you might have misinterpreted it. Now maybe I'm wrong but we might be able to save the future. I'll just need your hands and a sharp knife.

reading that, seeing my balls are the future...

the children are the future, true, true.

[–] jambudz@lemmy.zip 5 points 4 days ago

It’s the damn baby gender reveals!

[–] FreshParsnip@lemmy.ca 9 points 5 days ago (1 children)

He meant you specifically too

[–] Batman@lemmy.world 6 points 5 days ago

yeah dude, fuck you OP

[–] areakode@riskeratspizza.com 12 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Try being a kid in Kansas. "But... I've never even SEEN a forest!"

[–] rockSlayer@lemmy.blahaj.zone 10 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Yea, because you didn't prevent the biggest forest fire the world ever saw that burned down the lush Kansas Rainforest

[–] cheese_greater@lemmy.world 4 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

~~More of a canopy without the grove~~

Edit: Grove without the Canopy

[–] Sam_Bass@lemmy.world 3 points 4 days ago

your parents are responsible for your anxiety

[–] PlaidBaron@lemmy.world 3 points 4 days ago

You were the chosen one!

[–] Zephyr@sh.itjust.works 6 points 5 days ago

You were our only hope. So many have died in your absence.

[–] lowleveldata@programming.dev 6 points 5 days ago (1 children)

It's at that moment I knew I was the protag

[–] IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world 5 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

there has been so many forest fires. you have failed to stop them,

[–] FartsWithAnAccent@fedia.io 5 points 5 days ago

No.

Now take this shovel and get out there!

Good luck, we're all counting on you.

it wasn't a public announcement, it was specifically for you, you didn't take it seriously, many people lost everything because of you.

[–] Jarix@lemmy.world 1 points 5 days ago

Recently found out that Sam Elliot was the voice of Smokey at one point