Ask Lemmy

Complaining about the sunlight hurting my eyes.

The other day, my mom was driving and the sun came out. It had been cloudy all day, so I hadn't brought my sunglasses. She had two pairs of sunglasses in the car and fished around to get them, saying I could use one.

Unbeknownst to me, I distracted her right when she needed to make a turn. We had to make a quick U-turn and get back on track.

Moments later, we had to stop because the road ahead was blocked. Apparently someone had been speeding and there was a fatal accident. We heard the details of the news later that day.

My mom was moved by how, if we hadn't missed that first turn, we could've been at the intersection where it happened. I mean, my mindset is more, "Maybe the accident wouldn't have happened?" But there's only so much we can account for in life. If she sees it as, "Hey, our fuck up turned out to have saved us," I can support that.

DM'ing my first DnD one-shot. I really didn't know how it would work out, if it would even happen (people are unreliable sometimes), or if I was putting way too much work into it.

But we all had such a blast and we already have the next two sessions scheduled. And my friendship with my colleagues is blossoming from it and it gives me such a feeling of belonging and being appreciated.

Being autistic and socially awkward, this is a really big step

Brought a union rep from a different shop into a conversation with my boss. My boss doesn't like me and has been targeting me, as some coworkers have told me. So I brought a stranger to the meeting with me because my own shop Steward sucks.

Incredible decision. Suddenly the ball is rolling in so many directions and actually effecting things. So thankful to the rep and the union.

Switching from Windows 11 to Linux Mint, I expected some headaches after last using Debian 15 years ago. But it feels like home.

Hanging out with a friend.

I felt like shit that day. I wanted to die. I didn't feel like doing anything. There was but darkness and despair. Then a friend texted me, asking if I wanted to keep them company while they wash their car. I said "yes" because nothing mattered anyway.

Me, fifteen minutes later: 🥰🤪🥳

I bought an EV in november last year. Then gas prices almost doubled. Best investment I've ever made, it's paid me thousands

Need to give a little backstory here…

My ex and I have a kid together. He was born during Covid and I was away at the time, and it ended up that my name never got on his birth certificate. When we split up we never went to court over custody or child support or any of that stuff, we just made a civil agreement between the two of us how we’d co-parent. And it’s been working well so far.

Well not too long ago I decided that I needed to legally codify my status as his biological father so I had the two of us fill out what’s called an Acknowledgement of Paternity, which gets my name on the birth certificate. There were no selfish motives at the time, it was just the right thing to do.

Fast forward to today. My ex has a new gf and they’re getting very close and she’s been engaging in some fuckery where she’s telling my son that he can’t talk about dad (me) in front of his new “mama.” Never mind that fact that I provide the both of them with an insane amount of material support and that he’s with me every weekend. I don’t know what’s going on, but the situation smells to me like she wants to try and push me out of the picture. Well, guess what? I am legally the boy’s biological father, with all the rights and privileges pertaining thereto now. So if push comes to shove I am fully prepared to invoke those rights, drag her ass to court, and we can do all that custody stuff she never wanted to do.

I’m hoping it doesn’t come to that, but I’m glad I secured my legal rights when I did or that would be a lot tougher.

(Also to add I’m not posting this as ragebait nor am I soliciting advice. I know exactly how I’m going to handle this if I need to.)

Leaving the US at first chance. It wasn't an easy decision, but the door was closing and I am so glad I did. I wouldn't have had the opportunity today.

I bought a floor model Mac Mini M4 for $600 CAD while they were retailing for $800 in April.

Now they’re retailing for $1100ish CAD

It was a good deal that became a great deal due to all the hardware fuckery that AI is causing.

I bought Bioshock 1's remaster yesterday cuz it was on sale. It wasn't until after installing it that I realized it was the entire trilogy. 😃

Moved from Kentucky to Northern Minnesota. We had a plan to do so in the future but after November 2024 we moved it up about 7 years. Best decision ever. We figured everything was going to get fucky, and were able to execute the plan… So we did… It was a super hard year and a shit ton of work, but it turned out so much better than we even expected.

quitting my volunteer work i was doing for a decade and taking that time and investing it in doing classes and learning stuff. i'm much happier and more engaged.

i was hard because i was very guilty and attached to the volunteer stuff, but it was becoming toxic and it was depressing the fuck out of me and the people involved were becoming assholes to me because i have a penis and therefore I am a bad person. now the volunteer org is having all sorts of issues and I'm glad I'm gone and no longer dealing with assholes and idiots who think everything is a gender war.

Decided to upgrade my laptop last October instead of waiting for a newer model to come out around now. The price has eye-poppingly doubled, but the updated specs are not all that more impressive. I’m really glad I upgraded when I did.

On the server side, I decided to distro hop to Fedora 44 workstation for the first time (i’ve been using Debian-based distro for over a decade). My goodness, it’s very nice.

Changing my perspective a little.

For years now, maybe a bit before Covid, I’ve felt stuck in a rut of failing to express myself properly and coming across as a jerk when I want to be kind and friendly.

It turns out I have had no clue how to relax and not be in a constant state of fight or flight. So I spent time over the past month just learning what my body needed and practicing a more tender approach in the way I interacted with others.

It’s really opened my eyes more to how much the people around me are also starving for basic connection just on a community level.

Accepted a non-academic job with a permanent contract just before all my colleagues in academia lost their funding.

I finally pulled the trigger and bought/installed the PV system I've been wanting for 10+ years.

It was a good chunk of upfront money for something I feared would end up being a midlife crisis purchase*. I only have it partially installed (all DIY as time allows) but we've been running the whole house from it several days a week and have already seen significant savings on the electric bill (especially since the first week I had it hooked in was a heat wave).

*It's not not a midlife crisis purchase, lol, but it's also more useful than a sports car.

Quit my old job to work as a consultant.

Lots more money.

Miss the colleagues though... First company really shaped me as a colleague and friend, and taught me how to easily and quickly get close and comfortable with coworkers in a way that benefits everyone, with close bonds and good collaboration. It was a great first job. Miss you guys. 🩵🤍

I finally brought up a difficult issue I have been dealing with to a friend. To be blunt, they've traditionally been not-great-advice-givers but they had some strong advice this time and its given me a lot to think about.

quit a bullshit job with nothing lined up