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Don't you have 3 more wishes?
1 - I wish everyone had a monkeys paw
2 - I wish everyone had a genie that granted 3 wishes
3 - I wish everyone who saw a falling star could make one wish come true
4 - I wish the person who broke off the big end of a wish bone could grant one wish they desired
5 - I wish every cat and dog had a safe loving household to live in
I wish for a turkey sandwich, on rye bread, with lettuce AND mustard. And I don't want any zombie turkeys, I don't want to turn into a turkey myself, and I don't want any other weird surprises, got it?
You bring it to work at the museum and your coworker eats it
Granted. The turkey is a little dry.
THE TURKEY'S A LITTLE DRY???
Oh foul accursed thing! What demon from the depths of Hell created thee?!
Got it. It disappointing and unsatisfying
I wish lootsnake and hollow knight: silksong released tomorrow
Done, but they're a buggy mess.
Would it be worth it?
Yes.
I actually just had this happen to me irl. My old office was colloquially referred to as "The Dungeon" bc it was in the basement of an old dark campus building and to get there you had to take a somewhat circuitous path. I pleaded with my boss to move us to a new space with windows.
A few years later, we were able to move into a new suite in a different building with the rest of my department. Our new office even has windows! Except they're interior windows that face out into other surrounding rooms, instead of exterior windows bringing in natural light which unfortunately I didn't specifically mention in my wish. 😂
I wish that no life in the entire universe has and will ever attain civilization.
Granted.
Life is now characterized as any entity that extracts energy from its environment, replicates, and has EXACTLY 3 nipples.
Civilizations are now comprised exclusively of nonliving animates.
Touché! I didn't expect this. What are the nipples made of? Are they lactating? Just for display? Also, are they erogenous?
Fine. The nipples are erogenous and also made of lead. That should help.
Unless I have some sort of guarantee about what sort of twist the paw is doing, I'm not going to take it. Example: If the paw twists big, greedy wishes more than small, selfless wishes then I might be willing to do a small, selfless wish. If the paw is just an asshole who twists everything as much as possible, I'll pass.
It twists them both equally, but up don't know exactly how the twist might be usually. Sometimes it could be something that takes years to take effect. Sometimes minutes. Sometimes you might notice the effect yourself into later.
I wish it was the year of Linux, and they get 90%+ market share overnight when Gabe Newell announces you can play Half Life 3 exclusively on Steam OS, which includes in-game copies of The Winds of Winter, Doors of Stone, an English translation of Mother 3, and footage of 10 seasons of Firefly that had secretly been produced in private for Gabe.
The downside is they start the enshittification process immediately. The DRMs get worse, then the ads come, and finally the lawsuits and psyops on distros that treat us well and give us options.
A solar storm wipes out almost all computers and all tech to build chips.
In a bizarre twist of fate, a couple of houndreds linux pcs, a handfull of steam decks and a windows millennium survived the blast.
I would make the money's paw consequences similar, but slightly different.
A bad microsoft update somehow manages to permanently brick every windows computer on the planet overnight. Linux is now the dominant operating system, but mass societal chaos results from 90% of computers being permanently bricked.
that was just crowdstrike.
Oh, that is an interesting one.
Linux beats Windows, but also some become Windows eventually?
The other perks make me lean towards it being worth it, because this also implies the downfall of Microsoft.
Donald Trump bumps his head and wakes up as an objective and rational person willing and capable of acting for the good of his country and the world instead of his own unintelligent, narcissistic ways.
He leaves office to use his fortune to set up a charitable foundation leaving a JD Vance presidency
He gets impeached and convicted for abuse of power (because he is unwilling to cave in to corporate demands).
Now you have President Vance!
🙃
The down side is his rational arguments and rational way of thinking is always opposite of what you want. He also convinces the state and federal legislators to repeal the twenty second amendment and he stays in office for several terms.
Groceries will be affordable. But Nearly all Restaurants will be out of business.
Abortion Rights would be restored and codified, LGBTQ Rights would be codified, Workers Rights would be strengthened and we'll adopt a newly christened Migrant Rights But getting into certain job fields will be harder
American Politicians will no longer be corrupt But we will enter a World War to make it happen
Your privacy will be stored as an act will pass for companies to no longer mooch data off from you You will have to endure a life of nothing but verification checks
That sounds surprisingly tolerable.
I wish housing prices were actually reasonable and my generation (tail end of millennials) could afford to buy a house in the cities we have to work in.
Granted. All houses are now 18sq ft and only available in cities where all jobs require you to clock in at 5AM and clock out at midnight.
The housing prices crash no one builds decent homes and all you can buy is a trailer house.
You just described
It's a nice try, but it's going to have to be a far worse consequence to really make them want to take the wish back.
Hey trailer homes aren't anything to sneeze at! Too bad they're so fucking expensive now though.
Are you saying I get my very own trailer house? Woah! Look at me! House owner extraordinaire 🧐
I wish Donald Trump a short productive term and long health.
Granted. Trump succeeds in ending the USA republic and leads to a racist empire lead by the tiger king.
I wish Senjogahara-san loved me... Wait a minute...
I work for a little mom and pop business that basically operates like an anarcho-syndicalist collective; the boss more or less does his own thing full time and lets us all run things on our own. It's mostly fine but I've had a few times where I've... almost... wished that we had an actual manager to help keep things in line.
