Ask Lemmy

Me and my partner were going away for 10 days. The final task I had to do before coming to get her from work was to turn everything off in the house like the lights and TV so we weren't using any extra electricity or were going to come back to a burned down house from a faulty dryer or something.

I though, I'll get everything at once and turn the electricity off at the circuit breakers so I don't have to go through the whole house.

I was very proud of my smart decision so I told her what I had done with a big smile on my face.

"What about the food in the freezer you idiot" she replied.

She was laughing all the way back home to do the job properly.

I had a teacher in high school, who also coached the hockey team, who liked to make fun of you when you bought into something stupid by saying "did you know they took the word gullible out of the dictionary?".

So when he said it, I grabbed the dictionary and looked it up and said "no Mr Pizzo it's right here!".

He looked wonderingly at me and said "I would expect that from one of my hockey players but not you".

I also liked Motley Crue a lot in grade 7, and because I had just begun learning French decided to ask my French teacher what the lyric about menage a trois meant. It was very innocent of me, and she told me it meant three people living in a house together.

When I decided to test if the tip of my welder was cool to touch yet by holding it right next to my lip.

I touched my lip.

It was still hot.

I personally have not, but every day my bowels are tested with the onslaught of stupidity from humanity.

My guitar teacher got me with a good one. At one point we were discussing care and replacement of the strings, named by the notes they play (E-string, A-String, etc) ……. I wanted to be diligent about taking care of my guitar so innocent kid me spent days talking about buying a new G-string before someone had mercy on me and explained it

Edited to clarify and add a little context

Not that I recall, but I feel you have a story you're not telling us?

I've forgotten how to spell "of" before because I couldn't sound it out. Not my proudest moment.

No, but I have done and said stuff that gives me an intense feeling of embarrassment when I recall the event.

I built a solar tracking system with light sensors for a solar cooker. It worked beautifully on a cloudless day but sometimes got confused when there were some clouds. Some weeks later I realized that my glorious invention was trying to find something we know the position of at any time during the day. Considering the time and money spent and how smart I had felt for building that monstrosity made me feel very dumb afterwards.

I once wondered aloud how they get tanning beds to emit vitamin D. I then immediately corrected myself by saying that it was photosynthesis, which is technically correct, but doesn’t sound right in the context of animals. I did not feel smart.

I thought of using the internet once

For a moment I thought a motion-activated sink garbage disposal would be convenient so I wouldn’t have wet hands flipping the switch and dripping all over the counter.

Heh.

Wow. That's intense and specific. I can't say that I have

I don't recall my thoughts, but sometimes it goes trough my mouth. I once ask why bloody sunday was not a sunday on the calendar this year. Yeah because, you know... a date isn't on the same day each year...

Don't be so hard at yourself. We all have dumb thoughts here and there. It doesn't look like so because people usually only externalize the good ones.

Every god damn day of my life

Edit: I misread your question.

~~Online: Pretty much any prank and/or challenge resulting in death or permanent injury.~~

~~IRL: Some old guy in the hospital bed next to me refusing to be treated by an African immigrant nurse, calling her slurs. (He might have had dementia, but still)~~