this post was submitted on 11 Nov 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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submitted 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) by Godric@lemmy.world to c/lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world
 
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[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 113 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] Godric@lemmy.world 71 points 1 month ago (3 children)

I ran over a toddler and an unhoused gentleman trying to read that. Good thing my truck is lifted, so there's no damage to the body. Your choices have consequences!

[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 30 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] PeriodicallyPedantic@lemmy.ca 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I gare noy???

What does that mean???

[–] heythatsprettygood@feddit.uk 4 points 1 month ago

I believe it says "I care not".

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Hear me out: why do we allow pedestrians!? It's like, get a car!

[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 20 points 1 month ago

c/fuckpedestrians

[–] humanspiral@lemmy.ca 11 points 1 month ago

spill proof drink containers are game changer!

[–] awful_neutral@lemmy.blahaj.zone 10 points 1 month ago (2 children)

The funny thing is your don't even need to read the text for this one

[–] mrgoosmoos@lemmy.ca 7 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I didn't even know there was text until seeing the replies

[–] psx_crab@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Yeah, everyone know he say yes and put on the ring 😊

[–] awful_neutral@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 1 month ago

Nah you're think of a different scene. This is the scene where he asks for sloppy toppy (passionately)

[–] EndOfLine@lemmy.world 71 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] idegenszavak@sh.itjust.works 48 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] Godric@lemmy.world 30 points 1 month ago (2 children)

YOUR WELCOME GAM GAM.

I HAVE YOUR SCHNAPPS IN THE PASSENGER SEAT, DRIVING OVER NOW. I'M DRINKING ONE BOTTLE ON THE WAY AS "DELIVERY FEE".

SEE YOU SOON!

[–] rmuk@feddit.uk 22 points 1 month ago (1 children)

HELL YEAH, BROTHER, I'M CRANKIN' M- oh, sorry, wrong community.

[–] Godric@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago

HE'LL YEAH BROTHER!!!!11!!!!!

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago

Dear Slim...

Superbly shit post indeed.

[–] MTZ@lemmy.world 31 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] Grostleton@lemmy.dbzer0.com 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)

They'll certainly have a big brain when the blunt force trauma from the accident causes hemorrhaging.

[–] 18107@aussie.zone 21 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Texting while driving isn't that dangerous, I alw

[–] Godric@lemmy.world 24 points 1 month ago

Like Gramma always said, "it's not the drunk drivers that are the problem. It's those fucking drunk crashers giving us a bad name!"

[–] mrgoosmoos@lemmy.ca 7 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I know we all joke about this, but like, it's literally probably safer than using a fucking unintuitive touchscreen to control your climate settings or wipers or headlights

you could have a dash mounted phone and use voice to text, and that is pretty much guaranteed less of a distraction to a driver than trying to navigate menus to turn off their high beams

[–] 18107@aussie.zone 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I will not buy a car that requires the touchscreen to operate essential functions like wipers.

Putting indicator buttons on the steering wheel is just as bad if the steering wheel can turn more than 45°.

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[–] fonix232@fedia.io 3 points 1 month ago

Fedisniper strikes again. When will this terror end?

[–] BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works 17 points 1 month ago

And while you're at it, put handles on pudding cups so I can steer and hold my snack. I need my right hand for the spoon and scrolling Youtube,

[–] L0rdMathias@sh.itjust.works 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

And remove ads from YouTube while you're at it. Don't they know taking both my hands off the wheel to pick up my phone and hit skip is dangerous???!??

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 4 points 1 month ago (2 children)

If your car has a digital speedometer, etc... it's possible you can replace that entire distracting panel with your YouTubes.

[–] rmuk@feddit.uk 5 points 1 month ago (2 children)

FFS, what's wrong with you dumbasses? Watching YouTube on your phone or on the instrument cluster is fucking insane and you ought to be ashamed of yourself. Seriously, I don't care if you're joking or not, grow the fuck up.

Eye strain is no laughing matter. Use a tablet.

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[–] BootLoop@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

90% of drivers admit to taking their eyes off the road to look down at their speedometer. Together we can stop this.

[–] Petter1@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 1 month ago

I have a max speed enforcer built in my car, i always drive pedal down like in mario kart don’t need speedometer.. Maybe I am 10% 🧐

[–] LarsIsCool@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago (2 children)

NORMALIZE ADDING BRAILLE FOR BLIND PEOPLE

[–] python@lemmy.world 13 points 1 month ago

*ONE HANDED BRAILLE FOR BLIND PEOPLE WHO ARE CURRENTLY DRIVING

[–] QuinnyCoded@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 month ago

:-:•;°°*:.;.--•

[–] specialwall@midwest.social 8 points 1 month ago

I was trying to read this while driving, but there wasn't enough contrast between the white text and the light gray cat 😿

[–] jaggedrobotpubes@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago

You'll get smaller text so your eyes stay on the road and you'll like it.

[–] AlsaValderaan@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I was slowly scrolling down while reading, expecting it to say "while drunk"

[–] Godric@lemmy.world 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

How else is one supposed to drive?

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago

While drinking? Drunk means I'm finished, past tense.

[–] Bazell@lemmy.zip 5 points 1 month ago

Normalize transforming memes into GIF where only 1 big letter per frame will be shown over all the image.

[–] ShaggySnacks@lemmy.myserv.one 4 points 1 month ago

This reminds me of an old Insanity Wolf meme.

ALMOST HIT SOMEONE DRIVING, BETTER TWEET ABOUT IT

[–] peoplebeproblems@midwest.social 3 points 1 month ago
[–] UltraMagnus0001@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

My old blind ass needs to see my memes when driving bitches. Do It

[–] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

##CATS SHOULD NOT HAVE DRIVER'S LICENSES##

[–] Godric@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago

Silence, heretic!

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