Alpine is minimal. That kid would show up in one piece pajamas because it serves the job of pants, shirt, underwear, and sweater+hood (if it comes with a hood).
this post was submitted on 24 Feb 2026
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don't forget their lunchbox (BusyBox)
It better be a batman lunchbox.
Meme needs to be revised to this
Poor OpenSuse. The exchange student. Pivotal to the group project. Everybody loves them when their arpund but no one mentions them
Slackware: Just sits there quietly and tries to blend in, but wears a plaid 3-piece-suit and smokes a pipe.
I think Slackware would be more:
Sits in the back of the room quietly working, well wearing a three piece plaid suit and smoking a pipe. Depending on the day the pipe may contain tobacco, marijuana, and/or mushrooms. Still uses a slide ruler because its stable tech.
Slackware is the ancient teacher still using chalk and a blackboard threatening to beat misbehaving kids.
a student is outdated?
Still uses memes from 10 years ago
Apparently there are no women in Linuxville?
Nah Fedora's a girl, sorry that's how you find out your mom is gay
Give the arch and gentoo users a couple months π€£
Even though I find it likely that you detected an actual bias in the design of the meme, I don't see any explicit indications of Manjaro's, Fedora's or Alpine's genders.
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Bazzite: Sweaty gamer in their momβs basement. Goes a minimum of 2 days without showering. Talks like they know stuff, but really they parrot what they read on internet forums. Could change their whole life if they wanted to, but they refuse.
Is nobara more or less unhinged than Bazzite?
Never used it. Canβt say.
Ubuntu is the tinfoil hat guy who believes weird stuff but people still follow her because she is loud
I was thinking Ubuntu is the one who follows people around and steps on the heels of their shoes while they walk, but has loads of "friends" because they have money.
That fits as well π
Ubuntu is the annoying self-diagnosed kid that demands the whole class be run to his bizarre standards to the detriment of all the other students.
NixOS is missing cause they graduated early π
NixOs is the one in the corner playing with their imaginary friends.
lol NixOS shows up every day with their younger sibling that is somehow smarter than them but yesterday they were the younger sibling
Sorry about your mom btw
Manjaro: the one who never does their homework but still gets a pass.
Ubuntu is always trying to sell you stuff by forcing it into random unrelated conversations
I feel the word reliable is missing for Debian.
Debian - A little boring and outdated, but friendly and reliable. Everyone likes him.
Like this?
Friendly, trustworthy and reliable! π
Mint, or/and Bazite?
Mint - nice and polite kid, doesn't smell bad
Always offering gum and tic taks to everyone.
Takes the new kids under their wing.
Mint is probably the first years' teacher who still hasn't burned out
Bazzite: The kid with rich parents who has built three gaming PCs in the past year, just to keep his hardware up-to-dateβ¦ But he only uses them to emulate games that are at least 10 years old. He also thinks RAID is a backup. He happily parrots whatever last weekβs tech blogger was posting about, but he gets some big parts of it wrong because he only read the AI generated summaries.
I'm a Fedora user, what does that say about me?
You fucked OP's mom.
Loving family, lots of friends, wealthy, intelligent, very cute pets.
manjaro also frequently steps on his own glasses and can't see without them.
alpine should have some minimalist edc stuff but nothing fancy and doesn't do anything else that stands out
I use Arch btw
Debian
everyone likes him
Press X for Highly Doubt
Really? What do people have against Debian?
Obsolete. No WiFi drivers ever. (Might be false by now.) Always breaks during major upgrades (thatβs only my experience, so I could be wrong here too). But hey, itβs obsolete!
Donβt break Debian, they say.
Up to my newest laptop (which is over 4yo now), debian always had working wifi drivers from the live distro.
For a real "no wifi drivers ever", try SliTaz. It doesn't have working drivers even on my 2012 asus laptop
Iβve been with Debian through 2000s and 2010s, and if youβre someone not knowing this foss vs proprietary thing, itβs quite difficult to explain why thereβs no WiFi drivers and that you need to do some complex hoops to get this working. I had no WiFi on most laptops I interacted with, all the time.
However, fair to say that just this week I had a Fedora installation for a friendβs MacBook from 2009, and we faced no WiFi thing either. Had to install Broadcom drivers separately. So, I myself understand why thereβs no drivers included, but itβs not whatβs easy to explain this to someone migrating off Windows. Otherwise Debian is good, but I use it only for single board computers.
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Endeavour: Openly has a crush on arch, but is too lazy to put effort into dating.
I use arch but don't want people to talk to me
25000 words, high school AU enemies to lovers, hurt/comfort slash
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