This is such a short guy thing to post.

I'm 165cm (5'4")

Everything I say is a short guy thing to say

I can't believe so many men are insecure about being me. I'm me and it's pretty damn cool. The feeling of fresh grass on my chin in the spring... the cover of mushrooms when it rains... the company of leprechauns... I see only pros and no cons

In other words, "be a dick to somebody and watch them get angry." Not sure why that's gendered.

Also, most of this is promoting toxic masculinity, so if it's supposed to have a quasi-feminist undertone, it's not doing it right.

I don't understand the need for hating on short men and body shaming. We should come together to hate on men for their character.

I'm so glad I'm not short. Short guys just get shit on so much. Been at parties where someone just out of nowhere says "You'd be hot if you wasn't short". Like imagine that for anything else "you'd be hot if you wasn't black". "You'd be hot if you wasn't in a wheelchair" just getting shit on for genetics.

Same girls also cry murder if somebody says something about a fat girl, which is in their control.

Reads like what someone thought would rage bait someone else

This kinda reads as a list of things an obviously butthurt person would say

A chunk of them would just be pretty hilarious to say to me as an obviously big guy

So be a cunt to someone for no reason pisses them off?

'Things you should say if you want everyone to know you're rage-baiting shit disturber'.

I just don't understand why men don't do fun things with their beards like the 1800s

like c'mon you're telling me you DONT want to shave it into giant kitty whiskers?!?! BOOOORING :/

like look at this photo and tell me that this isn't an unexplored art form

Took me a while to understand that it wasn't a conversation between a woman and a man.

I love how OP restricted themselves to only respond in the mentioned phrases and how some have quite the reaction. Got me rolling.

"How to have a bad personality and gain toxic friends, a guide for neglected children"

Ok?

Why though? Isn't there enough misery and shittiness in the world as is? Why stoke the hostility?

For fun?

Sounds more like a list of things someone might be rage baited into saying

Return_of_chippy in this thread:

idk if i'm built different but i'd laugh at all of these bc they got me good. except sometimes i would answer to the feelings thing with "yes, that hurt" or some shit like that.

Randomly say "stop mansplaining!" in the middle of a conversation.

I vote we make “big truck energy” the opposite of “big dick energy”. Like: “you’re giving real big truck energy right now.”

I'm actually a little surprised at the reactions in this thread. When I read this, I was thinking of my husband and friends I could casually drop these lines on, and it's something we'd all laugh about. I guess I just wasn't thinking of someone using any of these lines sincerely or maliciously, and idk I didnt get the vibe that OP is just a straight cunt that hates men. But I could be totally wrong.

At any rate, somewhere in the thread below, u/wonderingwanderer created an alternate woman ragebait list, and that shit was hilarious as well. My personal favorite was "Act your weight".

"Jesus, is it your time of the month!?"

"Awwww! Your truck/motorcycle is adorable!"

"Shhhhhhhh...hush."

I find the word Champ to be wonderfully patronizing.

"What's got you down, Champ?"