this post was submitted on 09 May 2026
380 points (98.7% liked)

Not The Onion

21439 readers
1533 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, ableist, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] technocrit@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 1 hour ago

Millions of peaches? Peaches for free?

[–] jaykrown@lemmy.world 22 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

Meanwhile rent is going up? Oil is more expensive? What an absolute shit show. Imagine getting paid to destroy production to keep profit margins up, god forbid anyone got a cheap peach.

[–] Garbagio@lemmy.zip 8 points 9 hours ago (2 children)

What, and let corporations hold the bag? Are you high? /s

[–] jaykrown@lemmy.world 3 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

no no, we have to milk them dry, no food for anyone unless the corpos profit GOD FORBID someone benefits from the productivity of past individuals

[–] Garbagio@lemmy.zip 3 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

Someone benefits from the productivity of past individuals

COMMIE!

[–] jaykrown@lemmy.world 2 points 2 hours ago

Meanwhile another billionaire was created by just inheriting money. 🤡

[–] whoisearth@lemmy.ca 15 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

We can't predict the future but I'm in the camp that if we collectively get our shit together food will stop being a "everything I want now and always" to "eat what is local and in season first"

[–] HasturInYellow@lemmy.world 3 points 7 hours ago* (last edited 7 hours ago)

Very good plan, fully support it. However, you must then deal with he fact that this company (whoever destroyed the trees) is destroying the viability of the entire region by destroying food production. It should be regarded as terrorism.

[–] dan69@lemmy.world 7 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

In the words of a favorite skit of mine: Let’s Pickle em!

[–] zrcnwblnmn@lemmy.world 1 points 23 minutes ago

We can pickle that!

[–] greedytacothief@lemmy.dbzer0.com 13 points 15 hours ago (3 children)

I heard in the original post that these peaches suck and that's why del monte is having problems. I'm all for saving trees, but if we're going to replace them with trees people want I'm all for that.

[–] ThomasWilliams@lemmy.world 1 points 2 hours ago

No they taste great, but they cannot be sold fresh because they are clingstone, the stone is embedded in the fruit.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 8 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

i mean i'm from the area. ish. remember the whole boycott USA thing? we have the best damn peach ranch (don't ask me why peaches get ranches and strawberries get farms) about five miles down the road. i just damn near had a heart attack because their social media's last post was a memoriam for a family member and i thought they sold the farm. the boycott is why they're struggling, not the peaches.

[–] CultLeader4Hire@lemmy.world 4 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

Fruits grown on trees come from orchards?

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 5 points 12 hours ago

i know. it's just what they named their farm.

[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.cafe 8 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

Yeah, I read something about that, too. These were bred to grow fast, look good in the store, and last long on the shelf. Flavor was one of the least considered traits.

[–] ThomasWilliams@lemmy.world 1 points 2 hours ago* (last edited 2 hours ago)

They don't go on a shelf they are canned

[–] unabart@sh.itjust.works 12 points 17 hours ago (8 children)

Damn. I love peaches*. Peaches and cream ice cream is mad delicious. Had a dessert once, ages ago, where the peaches were set on fire for a short bit. Also crazy good.

Peaches lovers unite. Let’s go score some delicious peaches before they are burned away!

  • even canned peaches
[–] funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works 4 points 11 hours ago

"peaches (and cherries/berries) jubilee" is probably what you had

load more comments (7 replies)
[–] tackleberry@thelemmy.club 76 points 1 day ago (16 children)

Capitalism would prefer people to starve if it is the surest way to protect profits.

load more comments (16 replies)
load more comments
view more: next ›