this post was submitted on 27 May 2026
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submitted 8 hours ago* (last edited 8 hours ago) by Buage_@piefed.social to c/lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world
 
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[–] Mac@mander.xyz 40 points 7 hours ago* (last edited 7 hours ago) (1 children)

Spend lots
Go into debt
Buy successful company
Load it with your debt
File (it) for bankruptcy
Make out like a bandit

Rinse, repeat

[–] NannerBanner@literature.cafe 2 points 1 hour ago

You can actually skip step 1 if you want. That's what they did with toys'r'us. Those actions have long since convinced me anything financial is just a game played by the very rich.

[–] IAmYouButYouDontKnowYet@reddthat.com 71 points 8 hours ago (2 children)

It's this what America is trying to do?

[–] areakode@riskeratspizza.com 28 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

Buy up everything and then default on our loans? Yup. If they aren't trying, their incompetence is actually pretty impressive.

[–] IAmYouButYouDontKnowYet@reddthat.com 1 points 1 hour ago* (last edited 1 hour ago)

We are trying to outsource our debt to china.

Its all games. I don't thing people that care are ready for how fucked up humanity is going to get. But worse than that, I don't think many care.

"They" have humanity by the balls.

And damn... Like I said... I don't think people understand... All these people we called terrorists might have been trying to save us.

[–] BarbecueCowboy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 7 hours ago

Man, no trying, it's past and present tense now, doing and successfully did.

[–] lath@piefed.social 30 points 8 hours ago (4 children)

Loan was not approved. What now?

[–] notabot@piefed.social 44 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

Set up a shell company. Set up a trust somewhere with no capital gain tax. Shift ownership of the shell to the trust. As the shell, come to an agreement in principal with the bank to buy it. Use this as colateral to raise a loan from the bank for the purchase amount. Transfer the debt to the bank as part of the merger with the shell company. The bank now basically owes itself to itself. Sell the combined company from the trust, thus avoiding capital gain tax.

[–] merc@sh.itjust.works 1 points 3 hours ago* (last edited 3 hours ago) (1 children)

come to an agreement in principal [sic] with the bank to buy it

I assume this would go as well as Gamestop trying to buy Ebay.

[–] pez@piefed.blahaj.zone 1 points 36 minutes ago

That was no typo. Gonna use that principal like a tauntaun.

[–] gigastasio@sh.itjust.works 13 points 8 hours ago

Brute force loan application: Keep trying random identities until one goes through.

[–] wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world 6 points 8 hours ago* (last edited 8 hours ago)

pulls out minigun from payday 2

loan approved

😎

[–] ashenone@lemmy.ml 2 points 6 hours ago

Set the bank on fire and try the next one

[–] stickyprimer@lemmy.world 7 points 6 hours ago* (last edited 6 hours ago)

But the bank is worth $10 billion less.

[–] ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.works 9 points 7 hours ago* (last edited 7 hours ago) (6 children)

It's not actually ridiculous in principle.

Let's say I start out owning a bank with ten billion in assets, and the bank's value comes entirely from its assets so it's worth ten billion.

The bank loans its ten billion to you, and you pay me those ten billion for the bank. Now I have ten billion in cash instead of a bank that was worth ten billion, and you have a bank worth ten billion to which you owe ten billion. No one's net worth has changed.

You default on your loan to your own bank. Now the bank is worthless (its worth came entirely from the loan) and you have no debt, so your net worth still hasn't changed. Effectively nothing has happened.

[–] merc@sh.itjust.works 1 points 3 hours ago

The bank loans its ten billion to you

A bank that's subject to government regulation isn't going to do that unless "you" have billions in assets to justify that kind of sale.

and you pay me those ten billion for the bank

And surely you report that sale on your taxes and pay the relevant taxes, right?

No one's net worth has changed.

Except you, once you've paid your taxes.

You default on your loan to your own bank.

Ok, so "you" missed the payment. Now what? You think "you" can walk away cleanly? Declaring bankruptcy to wipe your debt is only something that's available if the government provides that kind of mechanism, and generally that's only available to people who have otherwise followed all the rules, which wouldn't include buying a ten billion dollar bank when they had no assets.

The only way this scenario works is if you ignore all the laws. But, if you're ignoring the laws, why not just make it simpler and simply steal the bank's assets?

[–] mech@feddit.org 19 points 7 hours ago

But now you can lobby the government to bail out your bank using tax money.

[–] marcos@lemmy.world 1 points 3 hours ago

Effectively nothing has happened.

A lot of people lost a lot of their money and got their lives destroyed. Also, the previous owners liquidated their shares.

But yeah, you haven't got any richer.

[–] gegil@sopuli.xyz 2 points 6 hours ago

Is capitalism real?!?!n1?

[–] stickyprimer@lemmy.world 1 points 6 hours ago

nothing has happened

Right, which is why it’s not some hero-swaggers-triumphantly maneuver. That’s the ridiculous part.

[–] zr0@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 6 hours ago

Except that there is also value from other clients and from the brand, which is then helping you to actually earn money

[–] callyral@pawb.social 4 points 7 hours ago

step 1: buy a money factory

step 2: profit

[–] superweeniehutjrs@lemmy.world 2 points 6 hours ago

I feel like the closest real thing is a leveraged buyout

[–] Chee_Koala@lemmy.world 2 points 6 hours ago
[–] OttoVonNoob@lemmy.ca 3 points 7 hours ago

Ahem, you skipped a few steps but ya your close to it. https://youtu.be/x9P-pYGu_ws

Noncredible economics

[–] webghost0101@sopuli.xyz 3 points 7 hours ago* (last edited 7 hours ago)
  1. aquire money trough established capitalist social network

  2. Buy a successful small businesses with employees included.

  3. Run it trough the ground to extract all profit and value of to recover the money used to buy it

  4. You barely made money on this but you are “famous company” and they where just an obstacle for your competing products who are making more now.

  5. Repeat

[–] PattyMcB@lemmy.world 3 points 7 hours ago

Step 5: Profit