this post was submitted on 06 Jun 2025
1160 points (99.4% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

33842 readers
4743 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 108 points 2 months ago (1 children)

You know what? I’m convinced. Flawless logic.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 69 points 2 months ago (5 children)

I don't need a machete to milk a cow

[–] tanisnikana@lemmy.world 18 points 2 months ago

Speak for yourself.

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 12 points 2 months ago (1 children)

i mean it certainly makes it more expedient

[–] dream_weasel@sh.itjust.works 13 points 2 months ago (2 children)

The re-milk value is much lower that way

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 4 points 2 months ago (4 children)

It's also harder to keep the blood separated from the milk.

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 2 months ago

that's a selling point, the blood makes you manlier (no no, that's not hepatitis, MANLY men have yellow skin)

[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 3 points 2 months ago

Reminds me of a terrible factoid I read a long time ago .... they feed young calves they raise for veal a steady diet of cow's milk mixed with liquefied rendered cow blood and other bio fluids.

We might not have the matrix or dystopian futures yet ... but we sure are on our way to building one.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 2 months ago

just get another cow? are you fucking poor or something?

[–] FooBarrington@lemmy.world 10 points 2 months ago (1 children)

.... I'll have to apologize to a lot of cows

[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 23 points 2 months ago

I'm guessing you also enjoy your whipped cream ....

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] usualsuspect191@lemmy.ca 66 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Diogenes: "Behold, a hamster!" holds up coconut

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 26 points 2 months ago (10 children)
[–] JasonDJ@lemmy.zip 18 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Not necessarily (platypus).

Biggest differentiator between the coconut and the hamster is the obvious lack of nipples.

[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

What also floats in water?

[–] spooky2092@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] Klear@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Former member of Atomic Kitten and Sugababes Heidi Range!

[–] vale@sh.itjust.works 5 points 2 months ago
[–] sundray@lemmus.org 17 points 2 months ago (2 children)
[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 12 points 2 months ago

breathes in oxygen
breathes out carbon dioxide
?

[–] LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

https://explorersweb.com/cold-blooded-mammals/

Does it count if we killed off the last of the cold blooded mammals?

[–] Walican132@lemmy.today 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I’m confused if this is in support of coconuts being mammals as plants are living. Or you aren’t aware that plants are alive.

[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago (3 children)

Do coconuts hatch out of eggs, or are they birthed directly from the parent?

[–] Walican132@lemmy.today 10 points 2 months ago

I… don’t know.

[–] Natanael@infosec.pub 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Seeds are equivalent to eggs

[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Do coconuts come from seeds?

[–] phdepressed@sh.itjust.works 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Are seeds birthed, or do they come from seeds?

[–] Klear@sh.itjust.works 7 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)
[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 2 months ago

Nah, pretty sure that seeds come from good pirates 🤷

[–] Cheradenine@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 months ago

Of course not, they're marsupials

load more comments (7 replies)
[–] LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world 23 points 2 months ago

If you see here we have the mammal known as a coconut:

[–] scbasteve7@lemm.ee 19 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Coconuts don't give milk. They give water. We force them to give milk. They dont do it willingly.

[–] joel_feila@lemmy.world 19 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] DaPorkchop_@lemmy.ml 5 points 2 months ago

Additionally, it is known that cows are mammals. Therefore, by transitivity, we can show that coconuts are mammals. QED.

[–] elevenbones@sh.itjust.works 16 points 2 months ago

Hmmm, very mammilian...

[–] akintudne@reddthat.com 12 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Incorrect. It's a hairy milk carton.

[–] nailbar@sopuli.xyz 6 points 2 months ago

Eww hairy milk

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Shardikprime@lemmy.world 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Squorlple@lemmy.world 11 points 2 months ago

Ernest Hemingway has got nothing on “has hair. Give milk. Not mammal”

[–] Outwit1294@lemmy.today 5 points 2 months ago

I am convinced

[–] Happyblonde@lemmy.zip 3 points 2 months ago

"I have nipples Greg, could you milk ME?"

[–] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

Every coconut is a hamster to me too.

load more comments
view more: next ›