Obviously: while the rest of the party argues, the trigger-happy blaster drops an upcast fireball on the trolley.
Next puzzle, dungeon "master". π πΆ
this post was submitted on 20 May 2026
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Party members can be revived, shinies can't
Also, if the staff is fully charged they'd all be taking 400 damage unless they made the DC 17 Dex save (with disadvantage because they're restrained). And even then they'd take half. Except if they have evasion, which is probably why one of them is smiling XD
which is probably why one of them is smiling XD
The rogue already freed themself, but it playing it cool to see what kind of party drama ensues.
I pull out my immovable rod...
why do we expect the trolley to kill anyone? some of those guys can be bitten by dragons and survive, they'll surely stop the trolley or be able to rip out of the rope on tipe
or the rogue can just undo the knots really fast
Massive damage can kill you instantly. When damage reduces you to 0 hit points and there is damage remaining, you die if the remaining damage equals or exceeds your hit point maximum.
Per Ghosts of Saltmarsh, a ship roughly trolley size (though ~ΒΌ its weight) does 25d10 bludgeoning when crashing, (considering a trolley approaching a track switch tends toward 10-15mph, ramming rules seemed excessive).
The party restrained on the tracks may or may not be immobilized as well, but regardless: 25d10 bludgeoning may very well one-shot each and every one of them instantly, and then some.
Let the people die.
The staff of the Magi explodes when its destroyed in a 30' radius.
The people are dead either way, the staff can be saved.
I think the Retributive Strike has to be an intentional action by the attuned wielder. I don't think damage from external sources triggers it, even if it breaks the staff.
RAW I agree with you, but since it also explodes if you overcharge it I'd probably flavor rule that it explodes if it breaks too.
Considering Gygax was notorious for gleefully murdering PC (mine incl [thx GC]), this also tracks for RAI, IMHO.
Love the one party member in the middle who's just smiling and living their best life.
He knows he's only got a few more moments to live, and he's going to enjoy those moments.
Thatβs the rogue. Theyβve already slipped their bonds but are waiting until the trolley is blocking the mageβs path to the rod so they can steal it.
Nah, that's the lore bard just waiting for the trolley to be w/in range of the pompous wizard on the lever while everyone else yells their opinion at said poindexter...
S/he's about to drop an up cast fireball on the trolley, "accidentally" take out the wizard, and get the party to the next puzzle to break ...on the way to cracking their DM's resolve. βπΌ
Fireball.
How is th--
Fireball.
Even if you don't like that solution, the chance that someone at the table does and has it loaded, is firmly nonzero.
Don't staves of the magi explode spectacularly when destroyed?
That party might be done for either way.
That is, in fact, the joke.
But you can't destroy artifacts/magic items and I don't see the Trolley being attuned to the staff and able to use the Retributive Strike Action.
You CAN destroy magic items. And this one has special rules for being broken, none of which mention having to be attuned to trigger it.
And this one has special rules for being broken, none of which mention having to be attuned to trigger it.
"Retributive Strike" is a magic property (just like 'Power Strike' and its Spell List). You can't activate or benefit from magic properties on non-attuned Magic Items/Artifact.
So if you break the Staff of Magi without using that Action, well it becomes just a broken Staff.
Also thanks for teaching me that one can indeed can break magic items, that non-destructible nature only applies to Artifacts.
It can be argued that you are not benefiting from the magic property in this instance, but instead suffering from it - in which case, it is valid for it to explode when run over.
If you try to use it as a bomb without attuning it, then it will fail.
IIRC, When a staff of the magi snaps, it explodes. So the party will die either way. You're just gonna have to decide whether you want a shiny item or not :P
I have spare the dying prepared, weβre good.
Oh sorry I have die the spared prepared as a reaction
See? Now, I'm curious what other fun spells'd come outta flipping the word order of existent ones. π€©
Like, would conjuring a Hand Mage call up a street magician?
Also, would Person Hold be a ritual hug spell?
Or, Cage Force grant a target incredible Con-Air hair?
I'm just very very tired of ball fire
That's amazing.
Here's a full work up for Cage Force:
Generate 1d4 perfect clones of the target, but with the face of either Nicholas Cage, John Travolta, or Andy Samberg for 90 minutes.
The clones can do anything the caster can, and have the casters base abilities, except for Charisma, which is an 18.
The clones are not under any kind of control of the caster or the target, and must be convinced or compensated for any request. But the clones roll with disadvantage to resist any request that requires them to make a performance check.
But, what about the Sassoon hair?
But, what about the Sassoon hair?
Wild magic. Lol.
Depends on what spells I have prepared
Trick question, the lever was actually an immovable rod with a cap glued over the button.
*Sovereign Glued over the button
The trick is getting said sovereign into glue form in the first place. That's basically why the item's so rare. They're super wily, that way.
Cast Wall of Force in front of the trolley destroying the trolley, and saving everyone. Then I take the staff.
That's an odd way to cast Fireball, but sure. π§πΌ
It depends. Did I learn Gentle Repose, and is that staff worth more than 2,500 gp?
It depends because official magic item prices are vague and bad, but Sane Magic Item Pricing has items that go up to 165,000gp and considers the staff of the magi too powerful to price.
Something tells me that researcher wasn't allowed to hold the staff and just decided to cover for lack of citable valuation spec. Or, the bearer at the time paid their academic fees, etc.
Either way, everything has a price, no matter if it's for sale βespecially to a D&D party. π It may not manifest as commerce, but it will cost them.
It's an artifact level magic item. It's worth considerably more than 2500 gp. Probably closer to 100,000-200,000 gp
Side note: you subconsciously pilfer for the proletariat? Sounds like a tough gig. Your ire is likely well-placed, and I support your low-altitude efforts. π€πΌ
What would Sheldor do?