I'm thinkin' Father Guido Sarducci will come outta nowhere and sprint to the win.
this post was submitted on 21 Apr 2025
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420 Blaze It
Bill Burr
I thought the crowd favorite would've been Luigi, though I have no idea what the requirements are for being elected Pope.
Be male Be a roman catholic Get enough cardinals to vote for you
So you're saying Luigi has a chance?
I'd vote for him
Dang I might have to change my vote
I think we should reelect Francis.
We just gotta set up one of those WH40K Golden thrones for him!
Guarantee they have something g gets already halfway there tucked in a warehouse.
I'm votin' fer yours truly. I'd make a kick-ass pope. 😤
I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and vote for you.
The Archbishop of Kabul
I see what you did there.
Yeah Danny sounds good. Or Jack Black would pope the hell out of that Vatican, literally.
Satan. I'm pretty sure he would greatly increase the morality and the accountability in the Catholic Church.
If nothing else he would send all the pedo preists to hell.
Accountability.
Resurrected harambe
Vermin Supreme.
John Mastodon
Thomas Ladder, the guy who invented that thing
The pope goes by AD&D druid rules. The new pope is the guy who killed the previous pope.
So it's J D Vance.
Last one was on the liberal side. Expect a hardcore, gay hating conservative this time.
I had read that Francis appointed 80% of the Cardinals who pick the new Pope. So it's possible that the new Pope will have similar views to Francis.
The pope elections always last long cause every man always votes for himself. Just like the pirate king of brethren court
Adam Savage
The Gang Bankrupts The Vatican
theme song
I am nominating myself, being as I am a Discordian Pope.
Cue Musk with his lottery for votes.
I'd vote for Elon Musk as Popeking of Catholicism.
The same way Elon "improved" Twitter and the US Government, I would love it if he did the same for the Catholics.
Elon can't be trusted with a literal sovereign nation, but I guess between The Vatican and US... What's he gonna do with it, harbor predators?
Probably purchase nukes and then become another North Korea.
Trump! Make Trump the new Pope. That would be hilarious!
Do you think that is why JD Nonce was in the Vatican? To force the Pope into announcing Trump as his successor?
I heard he was there to kill him. Hence his death shortly after.
All the pope had to do to live was say thank you, but he didn't.
That'll prove that the pope does shit in the woods.
Justin Trudeau
Robert Smith of the Cure.
that'd be badass.
+1
Well he did defeat Mecha Streisand.
Screw it, I'll be the pope if that means I can release the records on their pedo priest protection program.
"You're the pope?? I didn't vote for you..."
- Benjamin Franklin, probably. Or whoever it was that said "Not everything quoted on the internet is real"
Honestly I don't care (well, beyond making this ~~pope~~ post), as I am not catholic. I am technically a protestant by heritage, but the truth is that I find even the term "agnostic" to be too religiously loaded to the point where I usually refer to myself as areligious instead.
As for the pope. Well, he's... there.. well, not right now. But he will be soon-ish. I'll just accept whoevers named announced while venting smoke from the cardinal thunderdome as being the new pope. And then he'll be there again.
Beyond that, he doesn't affect my life in any way. Nor do I affect his life in any way. Unless he accepts my challenge to an offroad and uphill car race. Yes, he's gonna have to drive the popemobile himself for this. I'll be driving my new AWD Lolvo. I'm sure it'll be fun for anyone involved, no matter who wins.
But having said all of that: I think Robbie Coltrane would do well as a pope.
Bill Burr would be pretty funny I think
Lucien Greaves
Idris Elba
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