this post was submitted on 21 Apr 2025
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I'm going with Danny Devito! That fuck would straighten out the church. He got good morals. He just a nice guy. What about you?

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[–] sem@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 2 hours ago

420 Blaze It

[–] LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 3 points 4 hours ago

I'm thinkin' Father Guido Sarducci will come outta nowhere and sprint to the win.

[–] zipzoopaboop@lemmynsfw.com 1 points 3 hours ago
[–] missingno@fedia.io 15 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

I think we should reelect Francis.

[–] mysticpickle@lemmy.ca 4 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

We just gotta set up one of those WH40K Golden thrones for him!

[–] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 2 points 1 hour ago

Guarantee they have something g gets already halfway there tucked in a warehouse.

[–] Nasan@sopuli.xyz 24 points 12 hours ago (3 children)

I thought the crowd favorite would've been Luigi, though I have no idea what the requirements are for being elected Pope.

[–] Freshparsnip@lemm.ee 4 points 4 hours ago

I'd vote for him

[–] Agosagror@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

Be male Be a roman catholic Get enough cardinals to vote for you

[–] Nasan@sopuli.xyz 11 points 6 hours ago

So you're saying Luigi has a chance?

[–] gothic_lemons@lemmy.world 6 points 11 hours ago

Dang I might have to change my vote

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 2 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

I'm votin' fer yours truly. I'd make a kick-ass pope. 😤

[–] scutiger@lemmy.world 1 points 1 hour ago

I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and vote for you.

[–] ERROR_100_000_100@infosec.pub 12 points 11 hours ago

I hereby crown/appoint Rowan Atkinson as Pope Johnny.

May his Beanliness 🫘 last forever.

Related

[–] victorz@lemmy.world 9 points 11 hours ago

Yeah Danny sounds good. Or Jack Black would pope the hell out of that Vatican, literally.

[–] HobbitFoot@thelemmy.club 4 points 9 hours ago

The Archbishop of Kabul

[–] Freshparsnip@lemm.ee 0 points 4 hours ago

Justin Trudeau

[–] thermal_shock@lemmy.world 1 points 6 hours ago

Resurrected harambe

[–] roofuskit@lemmy.world 18 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

Satan. I'm pretty sure he would greatly increase the morality and the accountability in the Catholic Church.

[–] spankmonkey@lemmy.world 8 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

If nothing else he would send all the pedo preists to hell.

[–] roofuskit@lemmy.world 6 points 12 hours ago

Accountability.

[–] RangerJosey@lemmy.ml 27 points 15 hours ago

Vermin Supreme.

[–] Hermit_Lailoken@lemmy.world 1 points 7 hours ago

I am nominating myself, being as I am a Discordian Pope.

[–] squirrel@discuss.tchncs.de 23 points 15 hours ago (1 children)
[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 2 points 13 hours ago

Thomas Ladder, the guy who invented that thing

[–] Zagorath@aussie.zone 16 points 15 hours ago

The pope goes by AD&D druid rules. The new pope is the guy who killed the previous pope.

So it's J D Vance.

[–] TabbsTheBat@pawb.social 13 points 15 hours ago

The pope elections always last long cause every man always votes for himself. Just like the pirate king of brethren court

[–] Hello_there@fedia.io 10 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

Last one was on the liberal side. Expect a hardcore, gay hating conservative this time.

[–] CaptainPedantic@lemmy.world 11 points 14 hours ago

I had read that Francis appointed 80% of the Cardinals who pick the new Pope. So it's possible that the new Pope will have similar views to Francis.

[–] SendMePhotos@lemmy.world 8 points 14 hours ago

Adam Savage

[–] ThePantser@sh.itjust.works 9 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

Cue Musk with his lottery for votes.

[–] VitoRobles@lemmy.today 8 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

I'd vote for Elon Musk as Popeking of Catholicism.

The same way Elon "improved" Twitter and the US Government, I would love it if he did the same for the Catholics.

[–] Lasherz12@lemmy.world 3 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

Elon can't be trusted with a literal sovereign nation, but I guess between The Vatican and US... What's he gonna do with it, harbor predators?

[–] roofuskit@lemmy.world 2 points 14 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago)

Probably purchase nukes and then become another North Korea.

[–] kubok@fedia.io 4 points 12 hours ago (1 children)
[–] nylo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 7 hours ago (1 children)
[–] kubok@fedia.io 1 points 40 minutes ago

Well he did defeat Mecha Streisand.

[–] Sixtyforce@sh.itjust.works 8 points 15 hours ago

The Gang Bankrupts The Vatican

theme song

[–] Lembot_0002@lemm.ee 9 points 15 hours ago (2 children)

Trump! Make Trump the new Pope. That would be hilarious!

[–] mannycalavera@feddit.uk 11 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

Do you think that is why JD Nonce was in the Vatican? To force the Pope into announcing Trump as his successor?

[–] roofuskit@lemmy.world 5 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

I heard he was there to kill him. Hence his death shortly after.

[–] spankmonkey@lemmy.world 4 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago)

All the pope had to do to live was say thank you, but he didn't.

[–] ERROR_100_000_100@infosec.pub 1 points 11 hours ago

That'll prove that the pope does shit in the woods.

[–] betterdeadthanreddit@lemmy.world 7 points 15 hours ago

Screw it, I'll be the pope if that means I can release the records on their pedo priest protection program.

[–] neidu3@sh.itjust.works 6 points 15 hours ago* (last edited 14 hours ago)

"You're the pope?? I didn't vote for you..."

  • Benjamin Franklin, probably. Or whoever it was that said "Not everything quoted on the internet is real"

Honestly I don't care (well, beyond making this ~~pope~~ post), as I am not catholic. I am technically a protestant by heritage, but the truth is that I find even the term "agnostic" to be too religiously loaded to the point where I usually refer to myself as areligious instead.

As for the pope. Well, he's... there.. well, not right now. But he will be soon-ish. I'll just accept whoevers named announced while venting smoke from the cardinal thunderdome as being the new pope. And then he'll be there again.

Beyond that, he doesn't affect my life in any way. Nor do I affect his life in any way. Unless he accepts my challenge to an offroad and uphill car race. Yes, he's gonna have to drive the popemobile himself for this. I'll be driving my new AWD Lolvo. I'm sure it'll be fun for anyone involved, no matter who wins.

But having said all of that: I think Robbie Coltrane would do well as a pope.

Bill Burr would be pretty funny I think

[–] theywilleatthestars@lemmy.world 3 points 13 hours ago (1 children)
[–] ERROR_100_000_100@infosec.pub 1 points 11 hours ago

Pope Malarky

[–] DirigibleProtein@aussie.zone 2 points 13 hours ago
[–] fossilesque@mander.xyz 2 points 14 hours ago* (last edited 14 hours ago)

Lucien Greaves

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