They were specifically locked in a cave in the 40's so they couldn't help our least favorite painter
this post was submitted on 21 Aug 2026
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They served Napoleon, then got chased into a cave where they served some Yeti's for awhile until the 70's when they accidentally killed the Yeti leader and were forced out. Then they found Gru as a child.
Ackchyually Kevin got tired of living in the caves and recruited Bob and Stuart to help him find a villain to serve under which turned out to be Scarlet Overkill. She was crazy and the minions then stumbled upon Gru near the end.
The yeti thing happened while the rest of the minions stayed behind in the caves.
…I watched both minions movies on a long plane flight recently. They were surprisingly decent!
I absolutely believe they made that happen specifically in response to these kinds of memes.
Why would minions help Jackson Pollock
That’s true.
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★☆☆☆☆
Unoriginal AND proven false by the source material (they were conveniently stuck in an ice cave)
Too convenient if you ask me.
Almost as if someone with advanced knowledge of the universe arranged for that to happen.
Checkmate, Atheists!
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I was about to say this is established lore and one of the funniest retcons in media out there
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They fixed that theory by isolating them in Antarctica
I never noticed that, but it does fit and come as a relief.
You haven't seen the latest movie. There are apparently many tribes of Minions, including some that were in America in the late 20s to early 30s.
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Canonically they were conveniently living in that ice cave during that time period.
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Isn't there like a toungue in cheek comment about that in the movie?
The cop-out was that they happened to be frozen in a glacier during WW2.
Minions for Elsa (she was punishing them). Frozen takes place at the same time as WW2, but in a location not affected by WW2.
https://fictionhorizon.com/when-do-frozen-and-frozen-2-take-place-in-history/
Shortly before WW1 at best according to this link
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Maybe they were in the Deep South around the 1800’s
They were no doubt involved with banana republics. Can't forget the Khmer rouge so so many evil things they did
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Our concept of evil has changed overtime. In Dantes Inferno the people at the bottom of hell aren't the people who killed the most, it's the people who are most famous for betraying others. One of them is there because he stabbed the Hitler of his era in the back to protect democracy.
Dante's Inferno is also effectively fanfiction of a socialite without any real ecclesiastical value. He wrote in the vernacular, instead of Latin, which was what made it accessible and popular.
All religion is fanfiction.
I had a friend in college who wrote a paper that religion was started by the original nerds who needed to classify and rank which level of angel and spirit.
I believe he argued the term "Angel of Death +2" is as equally valid as one name to the next across cultures and history.
I still think he was right.
demonology was 1000% constructed by autistic monks
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if minions were real who do you think they would follow today? Trump? Tim Apple? netanyahoo? Sam AltMan? Putin?
edit: lesson learned, don't try to spell politicians names while high
Peter Tiel I think. Trump and Altman are more like grifters. Net Yahoo and Putin are contenders, but they're using mass murder to solidify their own power... It just feels too pedestrian
But Tiel is like a hardcore death cultist or something. He gives speeches warning about how AI will be the anti-Christ, then goes around putting up AI cameras everywhere. He's the type that reads 1984 and pays people to build the torment Nexus
He’s probably the closest thing to a Bond style supervillain that exist, if alchemy were real he would be trying to create a global transmutation circle to sacrifice humanity and gain immortality
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They’d be buying Teslas and spy glasses.
In a list with Netanyahu and Putin, complaining about glasses is a bold choice.
Nazis? Hmmmm, I didn't like their mining policy, very polluting!
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Why do you think Hitler killed himself? Imagine thousands of minions in the bunker with him all chanting 'ba-na-nah'.
I thought they actually addressed this in one of the first 2-3 movies. I could be wrong, I only watched them once and barely remember.
I think they were frozen in ice during that period
They were too busy helping the British systematically starve millions of Indians.
PS: There were no good guys in WW2.
I think they'd have split into groups, some with the Nazis, some with the British empire, some with the Japanese Imperial army...
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there are shit tons of videos what the minnions did in ww2 or their history in general tough it would be cool to see minions actually working for villains but its is a child movie and they cant merchandize adolf hitler or stalin
That’s why Germany lost
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