this post was submitted on 05 Sep 2026
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Everyone farts. But not everyone tracks their farts.

Now, smart underwear is making a case for paying closer attention to what comes out of your body. Its creators said they hope that tracking flatulence could eventually give researchers new insight into digestive health — and how a person’s farts offer clues about what’s happening in the gut.

Brantley Hall, the brains behind the smart underwear and an associate professor at the University of Maryland’s department of cell biology and molecular genetics, said the team’s “ultimate mission is to help people eat high-fiber diets comfortably with low intestinal gas.”

all 46 comments
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[–] BooBees@fedinsfw.app 26 points 1 week ago

That’s my secret, I’m always farting

[–] baines@lemmy.cafe 20 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] lemmygarden@lemmy.today 3 points 1 week ago

Harvest your fart data for the highest bidder

[–] ikidd@lemmy.dbzer0.com 18 points 1 week ago

Might be easier to track when I'm not farting.

[–] RotatingParts@lemmy.ml 12 points 1 week ago (1 children)

butt does it have AI (anal intelligence)?

[–] unitedwithme@lemmy.today 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

No, but the probe itself does have AI (anally inserted)

[–] YerLam@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago

It also helps you come up with new thoughts, with the AI (Anal Inspiration) setting.

[–] QuantumSparkles@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

The really fucked up part of this is the fact they are training AI on your farts so that some day AI will be able to realistically reproduce fart scents that smell exactly like yours without your consent

[–] nul42@lemmy.ca 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

And then they will say this is their intellectual property and you will be charged a licensing fee if a sniffer detects an infringement.

[–] partial_accumen@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago

They'll sell you custom dietary supplements so your farts can smell like your favorite celebrities.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 8 points 1 week ago

I don't need special undies to tell me I fart a lot.

[–] gravitas_deficiency@sh.itjust.works 8 points 1 week ago (2 children)
[–] LillyPip@lemmy.ca 14 points 1 week ago

Could be to learn about your digestive health, could be to discover a new fetish. Who’s to say?

[–] PattyMcB@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

More crappy data about you to sell (pun intended)

[–] YerLam@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] magnue@lemmy.world 10 points 1 week ago
[–] human@slrpnk.net 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Once per week but it lasts 6 hours.

[–] frongt@lemmy.zip 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I would, genuinely, rather shove a probe up my ass or collect a stool sample than wear some weird-ass smart underwear.

[–] Gexilla@lemmy.zip 7 points 1 week ago

*weird ass-smart underwear

[–] Asfalttikyntaja@sopuli.xyz 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Imagine your underwear needing internet connection and update's every time you try to use them. What a time to be alive.

[–] SarcasticMan@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Yes, but Fartmaxxing had never been easier!

[–] chaosCruiser@futurology.today 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

You know, there are performers (fartists) who would gladly pay for next-level fartmaxxing.

[–] BeMoreCareful@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

"it's Headley!"

[–] Marthirial@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

If it tracks smell, you are going to need a bigger data center.

[–] killea@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

Smartpipe at home...

[–] chaosCruiser@futurology.today 5 points 1 week ago
[–] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 4 points 1 week ago

until it stops working or the company goes under, then you are stuck with a useless overprice underwear.

[–] Casuls_Die_Thrice@lemmy.zip 4 points 1 week ago

God, I love capitalism…

[–] Rolive@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 1 week ago

Relevant username.

[–] NihilsineNefas@slrpnk.net 3 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

"They'll put a camera up your ass if you're not paying enough attention" meme becoming reality with the fartsurveillance panties

[–] hansolo@lemmy.today 3 points 1 week ago

Meanwhile, my spouse shouts "I tooted!" across the house because it's funny. I just don't count.

[–] olejellylegs@lemmy.zip 2 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

So they’re saying they want to guide folks to diets with lower farting by… telling folks when and how often they fart?

Like you don’t know that already? and who the fuck is living this sad life that needs AI drawers to strava their ass???

Am I living under a rock such that as it turns out most people have uncontrollable flatulence running rampant to the point we need medically enhanced AI? And they can’t tell nor track how often they pass gas????????

Is farting such a necessary thing that folks can’t live their daily life without AI intervention? Am I living on some parallel earth where my life isn’t focused on farting gas like a Junji Ito comic?

Is the world mostly folks who are about to explode from gas at any given moment?

[–] orenj@leminal.space 2 points 1 week ago

What the fuck do you MEAN Smart Flatulence Underwear

I think my farts have become silent since becoming diabetic, so I’d like to know why.

[–] FirstCircle@lemmy.ml 2 points 1 week ago

Forget about getting anywhere on the major online dating sites if you don't post a good, Certified FartScore on your profile.

[–] littletranspunk@lemmus.org 2 points 1 week ago

Oh wow, underwear I gotta charge...

No thanks

[–] Pfeffy@lemmy.world 0 points 1 week ago

Op is a staunch defender of computer generated kiddie porn , And it's clearly a fake account designed to generate engagement. Block this user.