568
RFK Jr. Took His Grandkids for a Dip in a Sewage-Contaminated Creek For Mother’s Day
(www.vanityfair.com)
It's merely the worm wanting to return to its ecosystem.
this post was submitted on 13 May 2025
568 points (98.8% liked)
Not The Onion
16181 readers
1671 users here now
Welcome
We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!
The Rules
Posts must be:
- Links to news stories from...
- ...credible sources, with...
- ...their original headlines, that...
- ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”
Please also avoid duplicates.
Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.
And that’s basically it!
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
Poor amoeba are going to starve
Idiocracy
I hope he gets the brain eating amoeba
I think RFK thinks that swimming in contaminated water somehow helps build immunity.
It is good to be exposed to dirt to build the immune system; not by doing so on literal shit.
George Carlin has a bit about swimming in polluted water as a child and his immune system being tempered in raw shit. I wonder if this nut job did not understand that was a joke?
That Carlin clip has been circulated in various alternative medicine quackery communities for a long time, I doubt RFK Jr. has any media literacy. The similar notion has somewhat entered in mainstream discourse with the concept of "immunity debt".
Doesn’t the rest of the Kennedy clan fucking hate him? Whose kids did he steal?
Oh, but when Master Splinter does it, it's somehow fine!?
"Hmm. Lisa, I'd like to buy your rock!"
just looked it up. the place he went to was literally 2 miles from the white house, in the middle of a fucking 6 million metropolis. honestly, regardless of what the national park said, who chooses a place like that for a swim and expects it not to be polluted?
Me to be honest. Where, if not in your capital, would you be able to enforce environmental protection of your streams?
Granted our biggest cities are smaller than those of most other countries, but in Zürich, Bern and Basel you see people bathing in the Limmat, Aare and Rhine respectively all the time.
Bro, Switzerland has gotta be a pretty notable exception.
I have literally never seen more beautiful and clean waters in my life than the ones I saw while visiting Switzerland.
It's sewage infrastructure from the 1800s that needs to be repaired - apparently the pipe cracked. I don't know why it hasn't been fixed yet, that's wild.
Environmental protection + Conservatives is usually a recipe for environmental disaster.
Which is ironic, the EPA was created by Nixon.
He only created it to block Congress from passing something more effective.
He certainly didn't do it out of concern for the environment.
He did like trains though! But I think that's moreso just the end result of being from SoCal more specifically Yorba Linda.
idunno people swim here in city center rivers pretty often in nicer parts of europe.
I mean water quality was a huge problem for the Paris olynpics.
I still check if there have been any recent discharges before swimming and I live by the sea where there is a lot more water to dilute it. Must be a lot more concentrated in a river.
How is this not child endangerment?
Because he is part of the ruling class. US law doesn't apply to them and never has.
The sewage was no doubt very upset to see its creek being contaminated by RFK Jr.
The worm in his brain is just trying to reproduce 🤷
That's why he brought his children.
When I was a little boy in New York City in the 1940s, we swam in the Hudson River and it was filled with raw sewage okay? We swam in raw sewage! You know... to cool off! And at that time, the big fear was polio; thousands of kids died from polio every year but you know something? In my neighbourhood, no one ever got polio! No one! Ever! You know why? Cause we swam in raw sewage! It strengthened our immune systems! The polio never had a prayer; we were tempered in raw shit!
Love Carlin, but this bit didn't exactly age well. lol
Carlin was telling a joke, not enacting government policy.
Why'd I think it was a RFK quote
Because we live in the stupid timeline, the one where this absolutely 100% could be real. I thought it was too lol
Satire is dead, it's no longer possible to top the absurdity of real life.
load more comments
(2 replies)
Well I mean later on in the bit he also talks about only needing to wash: armpits, asshole, crotch and teeth and you'd save time by using the same brush.
I'm certain if he was alive today he'd rip these morons apart.
load more comments
(1 replies)
load more comments
(2 replies)
the worm is driving the bus, in the search of moist organic material to munch
This has the makings of a great Gwar song.
load more comments
(1 replies)
Survival of the fittest.
Definitely the fittest brain worms.
Very emblematic.
Honestly these old folks had the luxury of swimming in many creeks and rivers with low pollution, maybe them going there today and seeing how bad it is will make them realize how we're destroying the planet for shareholder value
lol
Don't it always seem to go
That you don't know what you've got 'til it's gone?
He should just come out and announce that he worships Nurgle.
I say this every thread he is in. Like how is all the news with him nurgle cultist playback. Dude even sounds possessed by a warp demon.
load more comments
(1 replies)
He fucking hates his grandkids
deep breath for this one) has speculated that he may have been exposed to the parasitic worm that ate part of his brain when he stuck his hand in the bloody mouth of a dead bear before driving with the carcass to Manhattan and abandoning it in Central Park (exhale).
That's where the brainworms comments are from.
literally everything this man does can be explained by the brain worm
We’re 100% certain there was only one lobotomy?
“Mr President, do we really need to drain the swamp? Me and some buddies and our families still enjoying a regular paddle in there.”
view more: next ›