Ask Lemmy

If somebody pisses me off or upsets me, I need to stop brooding about it like a little bitch and call them out directly.

Over the last few years I've learned that I avoid confrontation to a fault.

Bonus: how did this past year's go?

Shit.

This time last year I was meant to be moving into my own apartment, then I was laid off, my mortgage offer expired and I had to pull out of the purchase. I now work in a shitty purchase ledger job as a temp, where my office is 50 miles away. The pay sucks and I question why I'm torturing myself working in this role just for some recruiter to earn commission from my misery.

Halfway through the year I had a (kinda close) friend disappear for roughly two months after a rough breakup. I met up with her at a karaoke eve when she reached out because I was worried about her wellbeing. She came on to me pretty hard, we kissed at least a dozen times, dirty danced a few times and made out once, but then she apologized and friendzoned me via text after I got home. And to make it clear, she was the one initiating all this.

My love life wasn't all bad though. I did date someone at the beginning of the year and while that relationship didn't last, the breakup was amicable and we're still really close friends.

Still not sure what I'll do NYE tomorrow....

New years' resolutions don't really work for 2 reasons:

• You're in survival mode so a year-long project is impossible to keep up, you're living from one day to the next or paycheque-to-paycheque.

Or,

• You're doing well enough to think of long time horizons. Likely then you have many medium- to long-term goals on the go, and you don't have to start them in the new year.

I find myself luckily in the latter case. I'll take the new year as a chance to evaluate where I am with my goals and adjust priorities, if needed.

3840x2160

Propose to my gf.

Same as every year since 2017: Stand up to racism whenever I see it.

How'd it go? There's a lot of racism out there, but I think I did okay.

I didn't even have a resolution last year.

I guess this years resolution is just:

Don't kms, try to survive as long as possible

Never forgot those who have hurt me, I need live long enough to watch their demise

Probably 1080p, tbh, but I'd like to get at least 1440p60, just to try it out

I’m going semi-vegan? I don’t know if there’s a word for it.

I cheated and started a few weeks ago, but from now on I’m not buying any more animal product although I’ll make exceptions for already bought food that would otherwise go to waste.

I don't make resolutions because when I did, I never managed to keep them.

That said, I do have an unwritten list of things I'd like to do in the new year. Like may be lose a little weight. And I really need to go for my eyes testing.

And then there's the whole philosophy of "why next year? why not now?" and "tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life".

For the eye test, I've no good excuse, but I don't want to walk to the place and find they're closed for the holidays. For the weight, I'd have to throw out a lot of food first. Not the greatest excuse there either, but waste not, want not.

(Can you see why I never managed to keep them previously? Yeeeah.)

Publish my novel and get back to studying Japanese. 私は少し日本語が話せます but I'd like to learn more. I don't even know if I said that right. But by the end of the year I'd like to be fluent enough to have a conversation.

Get back to my pre-COVID weight. Thankfully I just moved to a new place with a gym literally across the street.

Exercise. Because being a sedentary 40 year old man is catching up to me.

2500km of running. Did 2000 this year

I'm sticking with 1080p. that's my boomer opinion

This coming year I have so many! In the last few years I lost my parents and pets, last one was my loyal dog.

• To be reunited with my wife, this stupid visa system has kept us apart 8 months and counting.

• To start living together and rearrange the house to our liking and needs.

• To give home to another dog, it's what him would like.

• Keep exercising and building the home gym, involve the wife in such tasks.

• Be more involved at work. I like what I do but these years have taken a toll on me. I try but apathy it's there.

• Help the wife adapt to a new country and culture.

• House reparations.

• Small wedding celebration here (we married in her country)

• Planning honeymoon

• I want to be a better Christian sometimes I have strong feeling about topics I care about and I come out as very aggressive so I want to avoid that.

• Keep enlightening people about anarchism and to fight, in whatever way possible, against the bully system of States.

Not on my hands:

• In the last 7 years I have lost someone every year, family, friends, pets, parents. I want 2026 to be the year of gains and not loses.

I don’t set New Year-specific goals anymore since I find that being honest with myself about efforts from any starting point is more helpful than promising to make significant life changes at a specific date. That being said, my general goals are:

• Be more involved in community and humanitarian events
• Put on more muscle
• Set aside a large chunk of my income every month for my future plans
• Make opportunities to have new experiences

The same as last year, to do something to surprise myself. This year was a close one, but a few weeks ago I managed to interview a presidential candidate, so not bad (for an engineering student)

Trying to find joy again in things I used to love doing.

My new year's resolution is to prepare a new year's resolution for next year.

Help others achieve theirs

Not my idea, my SO : we all shared what we'd like to do in the future, so that everybody is aware of it and may find opportunities to help or support.

lol past me is nothing but trouble I don’t owe them anything

I honestly just wait to die. It's fucked I have 40+ years left of this.