Chlamydia is not the clap. It's gonorrhea.
this post was submitted on 21 Oct 2025
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“I’m gono Disneyland!”
There is no magic kingdom at Disneyland.
This just reminded me of a story an older coworker of mine told me. He was an old biker dude who used to be in a gang. His gang rolled into this bar and were shooting some pool when this "smokin' hot mama" (his words) came up to them and asked to join in on a few rounds. Of course, they say yes.
She plays with them and starts flirting heavily with everyone there. At some point, she says "how about we get out of here and you boys show me a good time?" So they take this woman back to a seedy motel and she bangs each and every one of them. Then, she has a friend come and pick her up at the motel. As she's getting into the car, she yells "Pete says hello and I have the clap!"
These guys are left confused because they're like "who the fuck is Pete?" Turns out, a different biker gang beat up this dude, Pete, at that bar the night before. So he hired a hooker to give the whole gang the clap.
So my coworker and his buddies all got ~~Chlamydia~~ Gonorrhea from this girl. My coworker was like "she said she had the clap - and she did. Lots of those guys had old ladies at home and had to make up reasons why they didn't want no pussy for the next few weeks."
Whew. But it was a different gang, right ? all these dudes got infected for no reason ?
Yeah different gang! Fortunately the clap is curable with antibiotics.
what a story 😂👌
God I wish I could convey the guy's tone and delivery via text, because it was so fucking funny to hear in person. He was an older dude, in his 60s, and just goes "she said she had the clap..."
then paused for dramatic effect, kind of looks off into the distance as if reminiscing - and probably thinking of a doctor's appointment dredged up from the past - and then completely deadpans
"...and she did."
Everybody clapped
Literally.
I was worried this story was going to involve jolly ranchers.
They were bikers, not ranchers.
Everytime I see the word gonorrhea, I'm reminded of the time the chill Aussie medical show All Saint's just randomly gave one of their characters full blown gonorrhea.
Wat
Yeah, he was raped 2 episodes before, then found out he had full on gonorrhea.
Rape also doesn't sound chill?
That's what was so weird about it, it was kinda like a soap drama set in a suburban hospital, sometimes it would get darker, but they went all out for that.
Fingerblasting is chill. Not an STD transmitted through rape. But what do I know?
I think you're getting confused, the show was chill then they went and did a rape/gonorrhea storyline for fuck knows what reasons, the rape and that were not chill, hence the reason it its stuck with me for so long, it was fucking weird.
Ah, ok. That makes sense. So no fingerblasting?
None that I can remember, but who knows with that show.
This guy STDs
This guy is old lol
This is one of those jokes where they thought up the punchline first.
The Disney College program is like a 3 month orgy. I know quite a few people who did in different parks and they all said the same things. They mostly hire attractive people, they put you in these big dorm buildings. There is nothing to do but go into the parks, which gets old, or shop downtown Disney which no college student can afford for long. So they just start fucking like rabbits.
I'm 52. Where do I apply?
Your local retirement home. Second most common place to have STIs after college dorms/frats.
Disney adults are fucking goofy.
Does Goofy consent?
This just in from Goofy, he says, "Guhuh!!"
He's down to hyuck.
See, I don't have a gynaecologist and I've never had chlamydia. Now, some might say I don't have a Gino because I have a penis, or that the two are in no way related, to which I'd reply: look out! Chainsaws! Behind you!
Oh shit.. Mom lays on the burn! LOL!
Mom knew from her Mouseketeer days.
Someone slipped her a mickey.
Nice.
Does Disneyland have a pharmacy?
I know they have a medical facility, and maybe some rx drugs on hand, but are doctors really calling in prescriptions there?
They've got full blown resort hotels in there, probably enough to, by themselves, count as a 'medium city.' I would bet they have quite a few workplaces you wouldn't otherwise think about.
Probably? Lots of sick people at Disney
Now I finally get why they call it the clap! Cuz it's such a happy disease!